Friday, July 30, 2010

Remember Me Discussion Group



Why do you think that the hair cutting incident was so traumatic not just to Caroline, but to her entire family?

11 comments:

InstantKarmaGirl said...

Because it's just one more thing.

Caroline is a sensitive soul. They all know she's different than other girls and in a family where suicide has happened, there is a fear of what might happen to other members.

Caroline is the best of all of them and I think there is a need for most of the family to keep that little girl pure, away from heart ache. They have poured the best of themselves into her and when she hurts, they hurt.

jessegirl said...

Yes, Karma, I agree. I think they want to make Caroline happy and protect her, to prevent any suicidal tendencies in future.
Also, the hair. Hair is a very visible symbol. Everyone will know something happened, that she was picked on, and the perpetrators want to show their power--yeah, little girls want power too--so if Caroline's appearance is changed the whole school will know. Also, Caroline herself will be aware of the violation for a while, until her hair grows out. Lots of time to feel like a victim. We all feel strongly about our hair, whether we love it or hate it, we don't want anyone messing with it without our permission. I don't know if I'd go so far as to invoke the Samson story, but drastically cut hair feels like a loss of power.

jessegirl said...

Karma..I tried to contact you at the July 24 thread, 'favourite scene', but I still haven't caught you. You said something which struck me so deeply and I used it in the next piece Kat will post from me, an article about the Ending. You said:
"Everything narrowed into what this story was meant to be, meant to do."
I hope you don't mind that I used it in my piece. You are credited. Please tell me or Kat if this is a problem.
You are so wise sometimes, Karma.

InstantKarmaGirl said...

Jessegirl, use what you'd like. I'm happy to share my thoughts and hope they are meaningful to at least someone, so I am humbled, thank you.

LTavares2010 said...

Caroline is a child, was a victim of a bullying situation and it is normal that people feel revolted mainly when the family is still suffering because of a tragedy that happened. The Hawkins are already so full of personal problems to resolve and this incident (violent, cruel, in my opinion) eventually becomes one more trauma for all.
But in my perspective, if the tragedy with Michael broke this family, the humiliation suffered by Caroline and later, the reaction of Tyler at school, make Charles getting closer to his children again and re-evaluate his absence in the life of Tyler and especially of Caroline.
Charles finally realizes fhree things: 1. that Tyler is overwhelmed emotionally because he is being like a father figure to Caroline, a good brother, he is not showing all his sadness in front of his mother, he is taking care of his own life and he is handling with his trauma about Michael alone; 2. that he had already forgotten how he and his son have tempers very alike; 3. that his daughter needs him too, not only her mother.

jessegirl said...

Thx, Karma
j

Jen said...

Caroline is the child that the families loves and wants to protect. She must have been 5 years old when Michael committed suicide. We don’t know if Charles and Diane were divorced then or if Diane married Les a year or so after. We can tell that Les has made sure she is treated like a daughter as Tyler is a son.
It’s obvious the children love and respect him.

Caroline has been bullied by her classmates and takes it with a grain of salt. She has her brother who is there for her on a daily basis and I think she feels she doesn’t need them. He spoils her and she loves it and she spoils him by insisting he is having a 22nd birthday party which is the age Michael was when he killed himself but he allows her to have it. She likes Ally and informs her that she is not a random girl but his girlfriend and accepts their relationship without jealousy.

Caroline is extremely talented and the family makes sure she is able to have the best supplies around. Her bedroom was an indication of how her easel and artwork was displayed.

Diane is worried Charles is going to hurt her by not going to her art show and he does. So when this little girl’s hair is cut it’s not only an assault to Caroline but the whole family. They have endured the loss of their son and now this innocent child is being abused by her peers. The family is devastated because Caroline is a good kid, she is loving, she is a gentle soul, she has had to deal with the sorrow and loss the family has gone through by Michael’s death. I think it was their goal to make sure that she is always loved and happy.

Now by the cutting of her hair they have been shattered and once again their fears are brought up that something could happen to her and they all join forces to make sure no one is going to get away with hurting her. Caroline sees this when Tyler takes her back to school.

jessegirl said...

Hi, Jen!
ITA, 'they all join forces'.
As a cohesive group, the Hawkins and Les too would be a formidable force.

WhyIstheRumAlwaysGone said...

It's devastating to the family because it shows them that their child is rejected at school and by all the other girls of her own age. We know Caroline is well aware that the girls consider her as a freak, but her family may not have realized to what extent, not even Tyler. The haircutting is a cruel act : it's a form of psychological and physical violence, a kind of disfigurement, something for everyone to see, and which will last a long time. Caroline is an outcast, she's unwanted and ridiculed. It must be particulary painful to Diane, her mother; we see her screaming on the phone because the other mother is obviously lying to her, saying that she believes that Caroline did it to herself and excusing her own child. Everything collapses. Caroline is dreamy, different, fragile and they know it. After the tragedy of Michael's suicide, you can imagine they would watch over her anxiously for any signs of dreprssion or suicidal tendencies (as they might have done for Tyler too). It's more than bullying, it's a terrible rejection and even though she's not been beaten up or physically harmed, this cruel joke has the same effect on her and her family.

Casey said...

I was wondering if I could be a guest blogger? I would love to contribute to this wonderful site. If I can't, I understand, but I would really love to be a guest blogger on here.

BellaMarie247 said...

This scene was gut-wrenching, unexpected and showed how mean children can be to each other for no particular reason other than "you're different from us, so we don't like you." It traumatized everyone because it happened to the youngest, most vulnerable one who was almost saintly in her sweetness and innocence. Caroline's family lost their fragile footing on happiness when this happened to her. Perhaps it was a foreshadowing of the immense loss to follow; that yet again, this family would be drowning in sorrow and heartbreak. But through it all, a new hope was found; with the knowledge of what can be lost, we must cherish every person we love, and every moment God grants us this life.

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