Remember Me Rated Top 10 Best Film

Clint from Moviehole.com has rated Remember Me as one of his top films of 2010.



10. Remember Me

Robert Pattinson delivers one of the richest and most weighty performances of any actor this year with his uneasy son and lover at the center of director Allen Coulter’s love letter to 9/11 (yes, there is such a thing).

To read the rest of Clint's post on Remember Me and the rest of his list, please click here:
Clint's Top 10 Films of 2010

The Love Stories of Remember Me

We are extremely excited to present Jessegirl's latest lovely article explores the different types of love in the various relationships in Remember Me.

by Jessegirl

Remember Me is not a chick flick, dick flick or any other genre film. It is not a love story, but many love stories. Yes, it shows us the delight of Ally and Tyler falling in love as games, jokes, discoveries and secrets spice their encounters. Emilie de Ravin and Robert Pattinson brought authenticity to their portrayals. It was easy to believe them. And I’ll get back to that romantic love later. But Remember Me delivers so many other kinds of love as well. I’ll touch briefly on a series of ‘love in the moments’.



I have talked about the compassionate tone of this film before and that is still the bottom line. So we have tiny gestures of kindness sprinkled through the film. For example, in the diner, we see Tyler totally immersed in his journal, oblivious to every reality except his internal monologue, and the waitress comes by with a plate of food which she puts on the table as she orders him—“Eat something”. Clearly he’s a regular and she’s been employed there awhile and she feels enough tenderness for Tyler to look after him.



All the little moments Janine has with Tyler also indicate an almost maternal caring for him. In a lovely scene in the diner, she interrupts her coffee run to stop by his table while he is—what else?—writing in his diary. Her smile is so very heart-warming and Tyler responds with a delighted sparkle in his eyes and a genuine smile on his face. They both wrap their exchange of pleasantries in a glow of pure contentment, revealing deep affection for each other. This is an example of ‘love in the moments’ in its purity.




Now Les, not shown in his complexity, illustrates what support looks like. He is always respectful of the Hawkins’ private grief, allowing them their space at the gravesite yet standing close enough to Diane to be the presence she needs. When, at the end, the Hawkins visit Tyler’s grave, Les takes a step back, knowing that Diane and Charles need to link arms as parents. At the sweets shop we see this gentle man second Diane’s enthusiastic expression of Caroline’s talent. Then, later, when, after the bullying incident, we hear him on the phone running interference for Diane as he simultaneously brings Caroline a tray of refreshments. At Tyler’s birthday party we only see him silently helping clean up and at the beach house he participates in a family game of charades. Altogether Les is a solid bulwark for his damaged step family, his love offering security.



Then there is Aiden, the irresponsible, live-for-today kind of guy who comes up with a cruel revenge scheme mainly because he is still too immature to grasp the concept of consequences and not—IMO—from maliciousness. Often the clown, Aiden tries every which way to bring his grief-laden friend into the present. Whatever his many faults though, Aiden is there to help Tyler when the chips are down. Not only does he go to the Hirsch home after the bullying incident, but he brings Ally with him, having gone to her home to intercede for Tyler first. He does this when he notices how depressed his friend is about the situation with Ally. Love between friends is complicated, but obviously Aiden loves Tyler.



Love is not just feel-good times putting viewers into their comfort zone. Tainted and damaged people have difficulty expressing love without the filter of anger, impotence or desperation. So we have two old cocks, Neil and Charles, one running hot-tempered and the other cold, but both loving so fiercely after loss that their actions threaten to destroy what they still have. And we have Diane, the mother, desperate to hang onto what is left. So she adjusts Tyler’s collar, pounds the table to get his attention, puts undo pressure on him to act as an intermediary between her and her ex-husband. She brings Caroline every dessert at the art show, to compensate for Charles’ absence.

Charles’ cold demeanour towards his remaining children is terror.

Neil’s over-protective, smothering intrusion into Ally’s life is terror.

Diane’s clingy, needy desperation with Tyler and Caroline is terror.

They are all terrified to lose what they have left and react in accordance with their individual personalities to the impotence of their grief.





This complex film on the face of it seems to begin and end with hatred. We have Ally’s mother violently shot in the subway, and, as a bookend, Tyler murdered in a terrorist attack at the end. But of course the bookends are really love. In the opening scene the first thing we see is Ally and her mother sharing time, the mother twirling her daughter, both of them ‘living in the moments’, their love for each other clear. Then, after the murder, we see Neil, grief-stricken, picking up the wedding ring and then his young daughter, shattered as he could be only if he loved deeply. And the real end of the film, the requiem montage, is all about love. One doesn’t ache, grieve, and heal without the impetus of love.




Grief cannot exist without love and where there is great grief there is great love. I have written about grief from so many angles in other articles and there’s no question that grief is the catalyst for all the action here. It is impossible to understand the heart and soul of this film or of the characters—or indeed of the actors’ portrayals—without understanding the grief inherent at its core. This is such an excellent and rare presentation of grief that what I covered in other pieces had to be said. That done though, I am trying, now, to touch on the love which would precipitate grief.

Caroline and Tyler, siblings sticking together through thick and thin, young and struggling, always sustain each other and have so many loving moments together. Almost every scene with Tyler and his little sister shows how deeply they love each other. I could recount them here but it would be a long list. Theirs is a mutual support. Caroline gives Tyler a wake-up call at the beginning. She insists they have a birthday party for him despite his hesitation about the significance of a 22nd birthday; it needs to be celebrated. This is how she shows him how important he is.



Meanwhile, Tyler protects her, looks out for her, but in a hands-on way. He spends time with her, providing her world with the emotional security all children need as much as the air they breathe. He takes the time to discern the source of Caroline’s pain, asking her questions about the girls. He soothes and comforts her by reading to her in bed in what is, for me, a favourite perfectly pure moment of tenderness. He shares wisdom with her and jokes with her at the Alice statue. When she asks if he’ll come to the art show, he replies, “abso-freaking-lutely!”. You bet he’ll be there for her anytime she needs him. All of this shows that Tyler is the only caring male blood relative who is present for her. Indeed, their relationship illustrates how vital to love being present is.




So many types of love are represented in this film. And there is romance too. This is natural for the young lead characters, given their age. Ally needs it also to become independent. And Tyler needs to be taken outside the realm of his dysfunctional family in order to ‘wake up’, so Ally’s influence is fresh.

Indeed Tyler, the lost soul, stumbles into this relationship with just enough life left in him to grab love when it is offered to him. And, as is the way with love, it heals, empowers, mellows, softens, multiplies. Ally’s unique perspective, her dessert first philosophy, her quirky personality, all intrigue Tyler and keep him guessing. Only with her does he have light-hearted fun, squirting her with water for example, his eyes wide open like a mischievous school boy. A little thing called enjoyment has come back to Tyler via Ally. The sex is full of meaning, the scenes bathed in an amber glow to emphasize the warmth suffusing their encounter.




By the time Tyler sees the screen saver, he and Ally have declared their love for each other and that power alone has softened his attitude towards his Dad. This is not only a good thing, but a necessary one. In a way the screen saver is, at that point, weirdly, both surprise and confirmation. Love has lightened Tyler. His burden is lifted. He all but skips to his father’s office, even before he sees the photos. He has been smiling all morning, even before he sees the pictures. They are just lovely confirmation.

Love has rescued him. Suddenly the veil of grief has dissolved and Tyler can enfold his brother in the embrace of loving memory. Tyler, that last day, is Tyler in a moment of release. Allen Coulter phrased it as Tyler being “released from his battles” [Podcast about Tyler, with Fetters, Osborne and Pattinson. June 20, 2010].




Remember Me shows us a plethora of little moments, so many of which capture, within each small glimpse, love exchanged. Despite what some have said, these moments are not maudlin, but are executed with a fine hand. In fact, much is conveyed with facial expressions and minimal gestures, like when Tyler touches Janine’s arm, or when he approaches Ally so very slowly before they make love the first time. Even the relationship between Caroline and Tyler is devoid of big bear hugs, sloppy kisses or tears, yet none of those are needed for us to be convinced of the deep and abiding love they share.



The stories in Remember Me draw together the characters and show us the good and the loving shining out beyond flawed humanity. They are love stories which can lighten our own burdens, can guide us to be released from them like Tyler was. They show us how to smile all morning long, as Tyler did, and greet the day.

No matter what comes.

Remember Me Listed

I don't think that anyone here missed the film, but it is great to see it mentioned. Hopefully, some who hadn't seen it before will take the recommendation and see it now.

Yeah, the first line is alittle snarky, but it's the over all thought and mention that counts!

This film, a heartrending relationship drama (it’s both about the rapport between a young couple and also one between a young man and his estranged father) that played to the tick of a 9/11 countdown, proved there’s much more to “Twilight” vamp Robert Pattinson than blank stares, sparkles and tree hopping. Quite simply, Pattinson was an eye-opener in this film. Skeptics need see it.

To read the rest, including the snark, please click here:
Moviehole.com

Remember Me - Massively Underrated

Laremy Legel at Film.com has listed Remember Me as one of the massively underrated films of 2010.

And if Remember Me had featured Ryan Gosling instead of Robert Pattinson it would have been correctly hailed as great. But people got far too caught up in the ending and Pattinson's celebrity to catch that he was really freaking good in this movie. Definitely worth a watch if you you're a fan of relationship dramas.

Source:
Film.com

More on Remember Me's DVD Sales

Alt Film Guide.com has written an article that Looks at the relative success of Remember Me's DVD sales.

The Robert Pattinson vehicle Remember Me, which divided critics upon its early March release, has reportedly grossed $11.03m on DVD in the United States, with more than 600k units sold. The source for these figures is a site called The Numbers, which focuses on home video revenues.

To read the rest of their article, please click here:
Alt Film Guide.com

Here are some other DVD vs domestic box office percentages from films that were released around the same time.

Dear John..... 36%
Brothers......30%
The Last Song......24%
She's Out of my League.....29%
Our Family Wedding.....30%
Brooklyn's Finest.....36%
When in Rome......24%
Leap Year......39%
Daybreakers.....41%
From Paris with Love.....53%


Sources:
The Numbers.com
Box Office Mojo.com

Remember Me Discussion Group

Many people have said that RM has a message. For you, what is it?

Remember Me DVD Sales

Through 11/28, Remember Me has done $11,034,174 in DVD sales!! That translates into 619,652 DVDs sold.

BTW, these numbers do not include Blu-ray sales.

Let Love In

Today, we welcome a new guest blogger, J. Jacobs, who explores a part of the realtionship between Tyler and Ally.






Letting your guard down is one of the most difficult things you can do in a relationship, especially if something you've experienced in the past makes you want to build a 10-foot thick stone wall and alligator-inhabited moat around your emotions. However difficult it may be to open up to a significant other, it is something upon which any strong relationship depends. No one wants to be in a romantic relationship with a stranger, so if you'd like for your relationship to thrive, you'll need to let your partner know who you really are and where you're coming from. Of course, this is a lot easier said than done.

in Remember Me (2010) Tyler and Ally are both bringing very disturbing family histories to their relationship. It is hard enough to watch your parents grow apart without knowing that the conflict stems from your brother's previous decision to end his life. Also, imagine trying to get through each day without being haunted by the memories of your mother's murder on a subway platform. These are the family histories that Tyler and Ally brought to their relationship, yet it was still able to blossom and grow. What was important in Tyler and Ally's relationship was not the fate or the physical attraction that might have brought them together at the beginning, but the fact that they came to know each other as real human beings. Tyler and Ally were able to open up to each other, and in the process, learned valuable lessons about what is important in life.

No matter what you've gone through, you can't let your past be the end of your happiness in the future. Life brings with it immense joys and immense pleasures, but we must understand that these are all a part of living. It is impossible to go through life without having people disappoint you, but we can't group everyone into the same category of "disappointers". Just because someone hasn't been there for us in the past, doesn't mean that others won't be there for us. Take Tyler and his father, for example. Tyler's father, an overworked businessman, didn't seem to realize when his children needed him, whether they needed him to show up for an art exhibition or to simply listen. If Tyler would have harbored all of the emotions he had towards his father and let them spill out into his relationship with Ally, their love would have withered away quickly. Overall, if you're someone struggling with a troubled past, let love in, because doing so will help you in more ways than imagined.

Remember Me Discussion Group

Do the characters in Remember Me "live in the moments"?

Remember Me is Favorite Film

Viewers have voted Remember Me to be their favorite Robert Pattinson film in the People's Choice Weekly Movie Poll (we 11-24).





The results of the poll was:
Remember Me 36%
Eclipse 33%
Twilight 23%
New Moon 5%


Excellent!!!

Remember Me's Tag Line - "Live in the Moments"

As a Thanksgiving treat, Jessegirl has written a lovely article that examines Remember Me's tag line and title in terms of Remember Me's past, present and future.

~by jessegirl November 25, 2010


So many audience members, commenting on their experience of Remember Me, express their take on its tag line, “live in the moments”. Invariably they see it as a message about life, even a lesson, which the film has brought home to them. Some take it to heart and vow to change their behaviour. In essence, people interpret it as a call to appreciate and be thankful for what they have now. This has something is common with the message of the North American Thanksgiving holiday.

Will Fetters’ simple words—which did not make it into the film—are, I think, most indicative of the tag line’s meaning. From the original script:

"You can’t know
So don’t take it for granted
But don’t take it too seriously
Don’t postpone what you want
Don’t leave anything misunderstood
Make sure the people you care about know
Make sure they know how you really feel
Because just like that
It could end."

Tag Lines:
Let’s backtrack a bit.

Tag lines are created for marketing purposes and act like catchy sub-titles which give people a little bit more information about the film, especially its tone. So we have: “It’s a job. It isn’t personal...well, maybe a little”, which lets everyone know that The Bounty Hunter isn’t a serious drama but is a romantic comedy.

This device will help pull in the right audience. Some titles, like She’s Out of My League, need little explanation, but tag lines like: “How can a 10 go for a 5?” are one-line promises that you will have a good laugh when you see the movie. One of Hurt Locker’s tag lines implies gritty nobility: “You don’t have to be a hero to do this job. But it helps.”

And Alice in Wonderland goes for the biggest demographic in its unabashed “Fantastic fun for the whole family”. Most of Dear John’s many tag lines emphasized gushy romance, for example: “Love brought them together. Will fate tear them apart?” This reads like something off the back cover of a Harlequin romance.

Generally speaking, I don’t think this marketing tool is meant to deliver a life lesson or philosophical message. Although Precious indicated hard-core realism capped by a general conclusion about life, spelling it out for you: “Life is hard. Life is short. Life is painful. Life is....Precious.”

I have never, as I recall, taken tag lines to heart or pondered them in any way. They’re just the slogans or jingles for movies, nothing more. “Live in the Moments” is no exception and never struck me as being very meaningful. At first it even sounded trite to me. The film itself is profound in its exquisite execution of a poignant story. Once seen, the film begs a wise tag line, something which will stick with you. For me the title, ‘Remember Me’, doesn’t need anything else.


Live in the Moments:
Bear with me as I analyze this phrase a bit. It can be taken many ways.
Jimmy Fallon, in his interview with Pattinson, determined, off the cuff, the tag line meant: “Do what you want, ‘cause you never know what’s going to happen.” He was kidding. This reminds me of the old song, “Let’s live for today”, which has a reckless connotation and seems hedonistic, an endless party, you know, sex-drugs-rock-‘n-roll. Enjoy but don’t take responsibility.

Or does it mean carpe diem, because if you don’t seize the day it will be lost? That you will have wasted it? Some of those commenting use words like:
Live –intensely, every moment of your life;
Live –in the best possible way;
Live –in the present (not in the past);
Live –life to the fullest;
Live –a good life, with good intentions;
Live –every day as if it were your last;

The thing is, what is the best, the fullest, a good life, to one person is different for another. The terrorists attacking that day no doubt thought they were living that day as if it were their last, living it to the fullest. Believe me, they seized that day!

The tag line, by itself, has nothing to anchor it and clarify it. Living in the moments means nothing separated from Will’s words about expressing love to those you care about because “just like that, it could end”. “I love you,” Tyler and Ally said to each other that last morning. That was what was important. That was part of what Will meant. It’s not living for today because you don’t know what tomorrow brings. It’s telling and showing the people you care about love, because anything could happen tomorrow, anything could take them away, or you, like Tyler was taken away. Just like that.

“Live in the moments”, without the rest of the sentiment, can be interpreted too many ways and is not good enough to carry the burden of insistence. (While I am pondering all this, am I ‘living in the moment’?)



Past, Present, Future:
It’s ironic that the title and the tag line contradict each other. If you are remembering, you are living in the past, not ‘in the moments’, not in the present. Everything about memorializing, never forgetting, is bringing the past into the present, keeping the past—in this case, Tyler’s life and 9/11—present, always. And ‘always’ means the future.

And when people ‘get on with their lives’, it means they work towards a future, like Aiden, buckling down to his studies because his friend’s death sobered him up pretty quickly. So Aiden’s partying mode, his ‘live for today’ way of being, was discarded for a more serious attitude. I don’t think Aiden and Tyler left things unsaid between them. I think they knew they loved each other.


One of the most significant things we do is ponder the past and learn from it. And we are always in the past when we are grieve, re-living the moments we had that person with us, or those moments we screwed up—all the Hawkins except Caroline do this—or moments we had no power over—like Ally in the subway, or Neil, absent at a crucial time. Grieving takes us to the dark night of the soul, to confront monsters more powerful than those in any fantasy world.

Grieving is not just a snap-shot parade of remember-me-moments which we want to relive—like Charles—or a journal in which we talk to the lost love because we miss him so much—like Tyler; it is guilt that we didn’t get it right, that we were somehow responsible. And guilt keeps us stuck in the past. Guilt is a very necessary thing, in the right circumstances; it would, for example, have served the hijackers well. Instead, they deluded themselves into thinking they were martyrs while they were slaughtering innocents. I bring this up to remind us that guilt has its purpose but, like any necessary thing, it can be misplaced.

Why should Tyler feel guilty about Michael? And why should he think Michael is guilty? Why should Neil feel guilty, for not being there, in the subway, that night? Diane and Charles, like any parents who lose a child, whether that child is a baby or a young adult, whether through accident, illness, murder, feel guilty because it is their job to protect. A dead child means you’ve failed. And some of the guilt could be well placed. Perhaps—we don’t know the details---Charles was so overbearing that he killed Michael’s hope for his future. (I’ll get back to hope and the future later.)



Living in the Past:
If anything obliterates the present, it is grief. A veil or film lies between the mourner and the world. He experiences things through filmy glasses; he knows the day is clear but an invisible veil hampers him from seeing it that way. It is removed from him, just out of reach, not quite there.

In many ways, Tyler’s preoccupation illustrates this [I covered this fully in Tyler in Remember Me - The Human Face of Tragedy and Tyler's Journal ] When Tyler keeps scribbling in his journal, he is in that other world. Should he be more present, more ‘in the moment’? Should he be fully present to what is in front of him? Well, apart from the fact that he can’t be, I don’t think he should be either, not at all. Tyler’s ruminations about his brother and about life are crucial to his healing and to the way he will be able to live his life in the future.


And should Charles refrain from living in the frozen past of his family’s life as it loops on his screensaver? It might not be the best way to keep his family close, but at least it includes them all, and he can imagine Michael there, imagine life before he and Diane parted ways.

But Charles is treasuring a past when the family was intact, instead of making sure his loved ones know every day that he loves them. The wall he has built around himself to shield him from his own guilt and loss has to come down so that he can turn to his loved ones instead of turning them away.

Charles needs a wake-up call, and Tyler desperately tries to give him one. One of the saddest things in the story is that Charles was just beginning to waken out of his guilt-induced stupor when Tyler died. Charles is the character who most needs to ‘live in the moments’, to cease taking for granted what he has. The irony may be that by living in the past, seeing Michael’s face every day at his desk, he is giving thanks for what he had but ignoring the beautiful children he has left.


Weighted down with real or misplaced guilt, the characters are stuck in the past and grappling with their internal demons. What will get them out of it? Well, in this way the film was perfect. Tyler’s voice-over, simple, short yet eloquently saying it all: “and I forgive you”. This is the biggie. This is the hardest thing, yet it is the only thing which will get all of them out of the past. Tyler has forgiven his father, and Michael. It is unstated, but Tyler has also forgiven himself, -for not being what he couldn’t be for Michael, for being what he shouldn’t have been to Ally, and just for surviving. That’s why Tyler is so serene at the end.

Coulter, Fetters and Pattinson thought it was just acceptance, but it went deeper.
We all saw that calm and serene softening look on Tyler’s face; he was untroubled, facing the day. It is ironic, but at the end Tyler was living fully in the moment. He was healing. Relationships wouldn’t be miraculously smooth sailing, but a good start had been made. After forgiveness, we can heal. Until then, not. Until then, ‘live in the moments’ is impossible.



The Future:
I have touched on the past: “Remember Me”.
I have talked about the present: “Live in the Moments”.

And what about the future? Well, it is what can be faced, as Tyler did at the end, only after forgiveness and love has made it possible to heal. The future is Charles and Diane linking arms at the gravesite. It is Aiden becoming studious. It is Charles with his arm on Caroline’s shoulder, then holding her hand in the museum. It is Neil and Ally hugging each other tightly. It is Ally on the subway, holding fast to her memories of her mother and of Tyler, and then letting their spirits go. None of them take each other for granted anymore. But it took the death of their dear Tyler and Janine to do that. It took death. It was a high price.

Remember Me explores the past and bids us never to forget. It reminds us to make the most of every moment, make sure the people in our lives know how we feel about them. And, Remember Me points us in the direction of a hopeful future.

The future is being able to believe that the spirits of Ally’s mother, of Michael, of Janine, of Tyler, can and will both stay with their loved ones, yet also soar away. Stay and soar. Their fingerprints will never fade from our lives. They will touch us and we can hear them, always. The future is hope.

Tyler at that window. Our hearts stop. But. Tyler at that window is hope.
He has to know we can hear him.

Love Letters for Remember Me

Congratulations to our sister site, Regards sur le film Remember Me - Looking at Remember Me who has posted their 100th post!

The feature of this lovely post is Love Letters for Remember Me. The post is filled with artwork and editorials about the film, submitted by the followers of the blog.

Please take a couple of minutes to check out the beautiful artwork and writing.