An Unofficial Remember Me Site: Countdown to DVD Release

Friday, May 21, 2010

Countdown to DVD Release - Favorite Quotes

Quote #32

"I know you think I'm a prick, but I have my uses."
~Charles Hawkins

12 comments:

soozy said...: I love this scene! Its the first ounce of compassion that we see in Charles. This is the tipping point in their relationship. They realize they are fighting for the same things. They both want to protect Caroline and avenge the wrongs done to her.

We get to see an understanding develop, beginning here. Then entire tenor of their relationship changes in this one scene. Tyler, who has resisted his Dad's help in anything, thanks him. And Charles teases him...not lectures....about not vandalizing any more schools.

This is the moment...with this one line...where we can finally see hope for these two. LOVE IT!!; May 21, 2010 at 7:45 AM
InstantKarmaGirl said...: @soozy, abosutely right. We see the love that has been so hidden for so long.

The hope in this scene sets us up for the impact of what's to come.

Amazing. Amazing. Amazing.; May 21, 2010 at 9:35 AM
Heidi said...: soozy and InstantKarmaGirl-I agree with you both. This is the first time they meet without any tension...there is hope for the first time that the relationship to get better. After this scene you can feel how that emotional weight is lifted off Tyler's shoulders. It's not a long scene, but it's one of the most significant ones..triple love this movie!; May 21, 2010 at 9:45 AM
soozy said...: I loved how this scene started...Tyler hunched over and guarded and he even hesitated when he saw Charles. Meanwhile, Charles is leaning up against the wall and you get the feeling that there's going to be yet another tense moment if not a confrontation. What a head fake!

They finally treat each other with respect. They each give it...willingly. And they each earn it in the other's eyes. They're both finally on the same side.

The more I think about it....this is more than a turning point in their relationship...it's a turning point in each of their lives. We see it later in the way Tyler handles his father's tardiness for their meeting and we see it in Charles when he involves himself more in his remaining child's life.

It's going to be a long month waiting for this DVD....; May 21, 2010 at 10:47 AM
Anonymous said...: There are so many movies I've watched that, afterwards I've thought to myself "Why was this movie made?", "What is it's purpose?". But this movie has a very clear purpose. I don't think any movie has ever affected me as much as this one has. I think it's because it's so real and honest.; May 21, 2010 at 1:42 PM
jessegirl said...: IMHO you are all on point today, regarding this lovely scene. It was like we could breathe again.
Karma...’the love that was hidden so long’...
soozy...’the tipping point’....’Charles teases..not lectures’...
Heidi...’that emotional weight is lifted off Tyler’s shoulders’...
All those are great thoughts!

What I think, though, is that the turning point was the blow up in the boardroom, quotes #55 and #48. Remember I said--#55—something about their wounds, which had festered so long, were cauterized and cleansed by the boardroom catharsis? That the positive results of that wouldn’t be felt immediately because the wounds would still hurt like hell after the cauterization, but that this cleansing was already working within them both? I think that’s when everything shifted, but it was imperceptible, invisible. I think this scene here shows that they got through the muck to work together for Caroline, for the family, to show love to each other again.

And karma, you had to say it, because it has to be said: ‘the hope in this scene sets us up for the impact of what’s to come’. That is one heartbreaking perception. Oh my, yes. I started breathing again, and then, later, of course, -stopped.; May 21, 2010 at 7:58 PM
soozy said...: Jessegirl, you make a really valid point but I still think their relationship could have gone either way. They were allies at this point; fighting for the same cause. Up until this, they were walking a fine line and they both had a history of stumbling if not falling.

The boardroom was a catharsis and each gave the other so much to think about but the pain that Tyler exhibited afterwards...the way they reacted to each other on the steps...they were putting it all aside for Caroline. It was an awkward truce at that point and kind of stayed that way until Charles pulled Tyler aside in that stairwell and uttered these words. This was the ice breaker...the olive branch.; May 21, 2010 at 8:47 PM
jessegirl said...: soozy...You and I are two stubborn b*tches. I think we both have good viewpoints.
The thing is, after the boardroom, they both hurt, but I never thought 'their relationship could have gone either way'. You know why? Because, under all this bluster--necessary testosterone as I've said before--these two love each other fiercely. I never doubted that. It was, I submit, the grief that got in the way, and that illuminated the problems in their relationship. Fighting together for Caroline created their alliance, one which, I think, they were waiting for. They wanted something to have the power to bring them together, to fight against together, instead of fighting each other all the time. I never doubted their love for each other. I still believe the incident around Caroline was the excuse they wanted so badly they could taste it, the excuse to do and be for each other what they always wanted. Finally, that specific wound each had about the other was healed. And they could fight together.
The 'awkward truce' was each of them scoping out the extent to which he could trust the other with the wound again. And they could.
God, I've gone on.
Yeah, 'the olive branch'. Hurrah, Charles. [no sarcasm intended]. But first, the cleansed wound. IMHO
Love sparring with ya, soozy!; May 21, 2010 at 10:25 PM
soozy said...: Yes.Yes we are!! I don't think we're sparing...we're challenging each other...yeah, that's it.

I dunno. I could have seen this distance between them going on for years. In my mind, Tyler blamed his Dad for Michael's death. He pushed him to give up his dream and get 'a real' job. I think that is part of the reason for Tyler's aimless lifestyle. He was pushing Charles buttons. He really was meandering but with purpose.

I think I've said it before, men would rather be respected than loved. We, women, are the ones who prefer to be loved. By not respecting each other, they weren't loving each other either. Ask any man....love or respect? They'd taken so many pot shots at each other in the years since Michaels death that I honestly think they'd given up on each other. Their minds were made up and there wasn't much that the other could do to change the perception of the other...short of this incident with Caroline. Neither felt vulnerable or weak on the common battle ground for her.

Now who's gone on.....LOL.; May 21, 2010 at 10:59 PM
jessegirl said...: Okay, soozy, round three [?] Probably the distance was there for years, after all, Michael died 6 years before, for one thing. I think Tyler is just lost, really lost, and so caught up in that, even if Charles’ buttons were pushed, Tyler didn’t do that in a calculated way. Maybe subconsciously. [God, I sound like a would be psychologist.] You say ‘meandering but with purpose’. What purpose did you mean? Pushing the buttons? Frankly, I think his lost state overrides everything.

Two posts needed here I think, so, #1:
Now men, women, respect, love. I know, you’ve mentioned that difference before. Hmm.
I guess it depends on how we define love. Way back in the dark ages, Erich Fromm wrote a book called ‘The Art of Loving’ and in it he ‘defined’ love as containing the following components: caring, respect, knowledge and responsibility. He defined each to clarify, but he meant this to apply to all forms of love, between lovers, parents and children, friends, etc.
Now I think, like Fromm, that love encompasses respect [and other things]. So that, whether it’s men or women, it is not a question of either love or respect. I think you can have respect without love, but never love without respect.
So, as a woman, I have never felt loved if I wasn’t also respected. And I would never want anything which claimed to be ‘love’ if respect were not a part of that. Am I so unusual a woman? Because if women think they might be getting ‘love’ but are bullied and disrespected in that same relationship, they are deluding themselves if they think they are loved. They are not. No person who loved would not also respect. Respect comes first but it must be there if love comes; it must be.; May 22, 2010 at 3:05 PM
jessegirl said...: #2:
However, in practise, we all do disrespectful things to people we love. When that happens, unless we are so thick we are oblivious to how we’ve hurt them, we feel a deserved guilt about that lack of respect. And I think both Charles and Tyler love each other underneath all the muck, but each is unsure of the other’s love for him. So buttons are pushed to test that love, esp. by the son, who expects unconditional love from his Dad. Yes, yes, yes they both want the other to respect them desperately because they know, intuitively, that without it, love cannot be. But IMO, they really want that love. It’s what we all, men and women, want. Only sometimes we think we can settle. But if it truly is love—with all those components Fromm talks about—we are not settling.

When Tyler called his Dad that fateful day, and smiled when he knew his father was just running late, his smile was not about finally getting respect; that had actually happened with quote #32. No, Tyler was smiling because he knew his father LOVED him. And when he saw those photos on Charles’ computer, his face said it all: ‘My Dad loves us, loves me. He loves me.’ And he had wanted that with all his heart.

While men seem to demand respect more, and first, they want love too, esp. from their families. While women seem to want some version of love more, unless they are fools, they will know that if a person doesn’t respect them, s/he doesn’t love them. Respect is the building block to love but when you have and give real love, you have/give it all.; May 22, 2010 at 3:08 PM
LTavares2011 said...: @soozy and jessegirl
Good points of view, girls.

For me, this scene shows the beginning of a truce between father and son. I dare say that Charles uses this attitude of Tyler, of defending Caroline, as an excuse to try to reconnect with Tyler. Charles finally begins to see that if he does not give the first step, it will not be Tyler that will do this. I love Tyler's reaction to the words of his father. At first, he is distrustful but then Tyler stays excited to see that his father had liked his attitude, after all.
Rob and Pierce are really great in all their scenes. They both give virility and strength to their characters when they are together. Tyler grows when he is in the same room with Charles. How much rancor Tyler guards for his father? How much pain and remorse Charles hides from himself and his family? I am always thinking about these questions.; May 22, 2010 at 6:47 PM